Effective leaders are good at building relationships. In fact, relationship building is a deal breaker when it comes to influencing others. You can have every other leader quality in the book, but if you can’t relate to others, your leadership sustainability and effectiveness will not last.
So, how do we build relationships? Here are four actions I’ve found that work:
- Find a common connection. If you take the time to talk to and get to know someone, you’ll figure out a common connection. When you figure out something you have in common, you’ll be more comfortable with one another.
- Find their win. No, don’t worry about a “win-win” right now. Just find their win. Figure out how you can help someone else find a win by achieving a goal, realizing a dream, completing a project, or meeting a need. If you help others find their win, yours will come back to you someday.
- Surprise! Do you ever surprise your colleagues? Surprise acts of kindness mean a lot to others because it wasn’t expected. You didn’t have to do it. That intrigues others and differentiates your intentions.
- Be authentic. Few things alienate others and deem you as untrustworthy as being fake. Just be yourself. Today now more than other, people are drawn to authentic leaders. People will want to follow you way more for who you are than who you pretend to be.